SERENDIPITY

Dewdrops on expectant eyes,

dreams sprinkled with greenery

the desire for you

 mirrored in red bangles

black beads guarding

 the blessings the life

all creep up gently

 as evening melts away

and create a whirlwind

Life's colours spinning a yarn

 melting into a glorious white

As the virgin child of purity

arises as the phoenix

not a soulful elegy

to a life that isnt

but a creation of cosmic

My  gift of serendipity



Blackhole

Sift through the Misc,
And you will find me
When through myriad lifetimes
You came and tested me
Looked in my eyes
Like an fleeting fantasy
Waiting for my dusk
To mingle with your dawn
In you the aura of the morning
Every light pales in comparison
Your fragrance seeps in my dreams
And waterfalls echo in the  jingle of your smile
Across lifetimes I wait enamoured
As your karmic debts are my chains
And like an ecstacy I live
Each life that you let go
In the certainity of the darkness of separation
Each day lived forward
Brings us closer to the emancipation
Yet I live as each chain you unravel
With the combined uncertainity
Which makes it a certainity
That our wave and particle
Will be one at the end
Sift through the Misc.,
And you will find me,
Your blackhole at the end of lifetimes.

NOTHINGNESS

I look forward to the nothingness in me, which is the most mportant part of my being.That void which gives character to the 'Me' as I see myself. The emptiness inside which is the part of me I need to be most comfortable with.




Just as the notes of music have the maximum appeal when interspersed with the appropriate silence between them , let my being be an extension of the nothingness in me, even when surrounded on all sides .


Let me pray for  a  pair of nothingnesses to create the perfect void in me.

BACK TO THE PAST

                                                                            

What did you do, lake

The cloud wonders aloud

My destiny molded me

To crash into blue mountains

Let go of the   swirling emotions

And satiate the dry earth

But the placid lake waters

Beckon me from a lifetime past

They’ve held me before

With a passion unsurpassed

Rhymed with my words

Melted in my feelings

Swayed with my verse

Then lay spent in my arms

With our senses reeling

Now my free will beckons me

To lose myself in him forever

The lake completed me

Not asking for a return

I can’t come back to you, mountain,

I’m finally in my beloved’s home.

POEM - RHYMING DREAM

My dusk is wrapped around your nights

My life entwined in your lonely hour

Another  desolate  nightfall  creeps in

and your memories watch from afar

When did they untangle themselves

From the once glistening thread

Untended they flew off laden

With the dew of our morning tread

Why do they beseech me to return

When they earned the right supreme

To saunter in and  drape around me

The fabric of our rhyming dream

And when the thread of my verse

Surrenders to your words sublime

Our dreams will become a reality

Of twin souls that merge across time

INTERLOCKING HANDS
-image courtsey google

POEM - CROSSOVER



                               

Naini Lake -Where the heart still floats

 

Creek side love birds



 The glimmer in the magic  of dawn

Painted the sea with a hue undefined

                          Sprinkling it with the fragrance

                             Of the snow capped chinars

The abras gliding gracefully

Transformed into  colourful rowing boats

The flaming orange of the trees

Blushed like the  mountain rhododendron

The cresendo of the waves

 Pealed in  the bells of the temple

The scattered leaves along the creek

Crunched like dry twigs in autumn walks

A fleeting glance to the shore across

Held captive by those on the other side

And tender words flew on emotions

To complete the unfinished verse in me

Why did I want her?

Back home after a long day at work, drained out, and a pile of chores to be attended to -Something happened to change the monotony into a firing up of emotions.My daughter runs to me , hugs me and asks, 'Mumma, why did you have me?"

How does one answer that seemingly inoccouous question.

-Is it because I wanted a girl

-Or a brother wanted a sister

-Or that we just wanted another child

No I definitely wanted a girl

Why did I have her?

Its a difficult question to answer.

Yes , I wanted a child, a second one at that,desperately..

Waited for a long time, till we both were together, after living together in fits and starts for some years

It's a lot to ponder over.

Ever since I remember, we sisters and brothers have been so close. Each  time one of us was in trouble, the others would pitch in to keep the flow going..to keep the morale high.We still do...

So maybe that was one thought, they wud take care of each other .

Another was- maybe they needed playmates- But playmates they grow out of each other,once they grow into precocious tweens

Why did i want her then:-

I shared a wonderful and close relationship with my mother,more so as she grew old and I grew up.I saw how little things made her happy

I saw how her concern for each one of us vibrated in her words and life.As she grew older it was a sort of role reversal. We became the  ones who wanted to do something for her. Every little thing that could give her happiness, we would try and do.As she had always taught us, that feelings matter more than money . Every act of love, that could make her feel good.The love in her eyes was reward enough for us

When her fingers were twisted with arthiritis, she would need help with her clothes. At times she would need help with small things, One in a while she would want our help to remember the names of some long forgotten aquaintance .It was  the medicines to be given on time , the small ways to keep her comfortable

More than anything, our endeveaour to convince her that she was the most loved mother for each one of us.

When she couldn't work any more, after a lifetime of taking care of everyone else, we made her see that her identity was not as her work, but rather the unique personality of hers which knew how to give and receive love.That was her importance

So probably when I wanted to have a daughter,it was these things that were  on my mind. I wanted someone with whom I could share the joy of being a daughter. A tiny gentleness in my home as she grew up, a whiff of freshness. A girl with whom  I could share small secrets. someone whom I could  comfort through friend ,fights and heartaches. But all this is a very small part of the desire

What I desire is someone to love me as I grow old.  A daughter who will touch me in the same way.

Someone who will  validate her love even if I cant work and take care of her.

Someone who will brush and tie up my hair when I old age and infirmity dull the responses and ravage my body.

 But for that matter, it could be my son too. It could be  the little girls who call me mami. It could be the some distant girl in the family or neighbourhood

Actually that hand which brushes my hair could be anyone, even my son.And that daughter could be anyone, even my son.

So what I wanted was a daughter , not a girl.

I am indeed blessed . I got what I wanted , and twice over!